ADHD, OCD and Soulmates

I never bought into the soulmate myth—I trusted hard work, common sense, and not embarrassing myself. Then a woman called me her soulmate, and all those rules vanished.

This series is my deep dive into that moment and everything that unraveled after.

I’m the Cynical (Yes Still Hopeful) Romantic: late-diagnosed ADHD, a sprinkle of OCD, and a relationship history that makes more sense in hindsight. For years, I chased the role of “someone’s person”—even when my gut said otherwise.

Here, I revisit my first marriage and beyond, sharing what I wish I’d known: how ADHD hyperfocus distorts love, how the hero complex turns romance into overwork, and why certainty makes the soulmate myth so seductive.

This isn’t a lecture—it’s memoir with side notes, a chance to learn from my mistakes so you don’t touch the stove yourself. If you’ve ever ignored a red flag for a good story, you’re in the right place.

Pull up a chair. Let’s unravel the soulmate story—and see what’s worth keeping.